Day 3: Beijing. Straight ballin on the Great Wall(in)

Today, I saw a man having a poo on the side of the road.

Despite the traumatic start to the day when my eyeballs were forever scarred by the sight mentioned above, day three was one of the busiest and most anticipated days of the trip; it was time for us to visit the Great Wall of China.

Friday kicked off with us visiting a traditional tea house and experiencing a traditional tea ceremony

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I was wondering how the Chinese look so good for so long and survive in this godforsaken smog but now I know; miracle tea. Traditional Chinese tea can hook you up dude. From needing to rejuvenate after a rough night out, wanting to look younger, needing to clean out your bowels (heyooooh) to “keeping your eyes bright for long hours of computer play”, the Chinese have got you boo.

The fruit tea was my fave. It was bright red and tasted like jungle juice. Took me right back to my childhood and I felt hella cultured because I was chilling in a Chinese tea house sippin on some tea from these little bad boys:

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The tea house had a huge shopping area where you could buy tons of tea and tea related paraphernalia. I ay or may not have picked up a few gifts 😛

After the tea house, the diplomacy 2 bus took us on an hour long journey to the Great Wall at Badaling.

We were served a super nyum lunch at the snazzy Badaling hotel.

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Chinese restaurants absolutely loooooove lazy Susan’s. With the amount of meals we eat at Chinese restaurants, at the end if this trip these table utensils should be renamed overworked Susan’s who just need a break to put their feet up and watch ‘say yes to the dress’. (Because this definitely rolls of the tongue so fluidly).

The Beijing beef (I think it’s called that. If it’s not then it should be) was amazing. For reals. Its a game changer.

With a belly full of sticky rice and Beijing beef, I made my way up to the wall (Sounding like Game of Thrones up in here).

The wall really is incredible.

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The view isn’t too bad either.

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Of course I had to get a stereotypical awkward tourist photo

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I made it to tower four! We had to climb up the steepest, scariest steps ever of life. The side walls are so short that the only way I could make it up was by clinging to the center handrail. What a baby.

All in all the wall (rhyme) was a pretty incredible experience. It’s amazing that something built so long ago out of dirt and egg whites (apparently that’s what was used to stick the bricks together) has lasted so long.

On the way back to the hotel, we stopped by the Olympic green. It was late afternoon and it was madness. Dwarfs were singing karaoke, men painted gold were dancing and people were flying long ass lines of kites despite there not being a lick of wind (I suspect magic) and vendors were selling everything under the sun. I may or may not have bought one of those waving Chinese cats. (I did)

The birds nest stadium is amazing! It’s such a unique and unexpected design but it’s weirdness makes it super cool.

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I had so much hope for the water cube! I thought it would be a legit cube full of water with like fish and few mermaids in it. But it’s just a big blue box. Meh.

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And then the sun shone on it and it look pretty fly

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Beijing you have been beautiful. Last morning tomorrow and then onto Xi’an.

Stare dolce

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